Greetings from the Week 12 grades of college football. Fear not, dejected supporters of Michigan; this is the second-to-last post of the year. Yours truly is sipping tea as you have some crow for supper after sending me absurd emails and tweets all week.
Regarding the grading from the previous season, nothing has changed: failed ratings cannot be improved upon, and exceptional work will only receive high scores.
The aforementioned school, also known as “America’s team,” received dismal scores last week. As the investigation into sign theft continues, they have gone from being strong and formidable to crumbling under pressure.
The Week 12 critique of the performances of players, coaches, teams, and supporters is as follows:A purported cupcake stuns Auburn
Schools who schedule weaker teams in this section of November have received failing ratings from this space for the past three years, frequently receiving millions of dollars in return because they have the capability and the audacity to do so.
As soon as November arrives, we can anticipate Mariah Carey’s surprise appearance, cheesy, unrealistic Lexus advertisements, and excessively early Christmas décor placement. Schools in the Southeast of the nation also begin the giving season; FCS and Group of Five schools are abundant on the schedule, their advantages as Power Five institutions showing strongly.
However, occasionally it backfires spectacularly, like it did in Auburn, Alabama on Saturday. The fiscally astute Tigers gifted New Mexico State about $2 million, and the team laughed that direct deposit off on route to their first-ever victory over an SEC team, a 31-10 thumping. Sadly for Auburn, the Aggies have improved to 9-3 this season and are no joke.
Maybe Auburn supporters should clean up after their own team with the toilet paper they were planning to toss on the oaks at Toomer’s Corner.
Three hours to the northwest, the FCS’s Alabama and Chattanooga met in what was the Mocs’ $600,000 pay day and the 66-10 winners in crimson’s equivalent of a seven-on-seven drill.
In an attempt to qualify for the playoffs, Florida State lost their starting quarterback in the process while paying North Alabama a meager $400,000.
It was said by them: “We have chosen this life. I usually compare this world to the mafia. “You get hired, you get whacked eventually, and you live the best life you can in between,” said Matt “Don” Rhule, the head coach of Nebraska and the man who earns $5.5 million playing the role of the Cornhusker nation’s godfather.
